Sinking....

Are you an addict??? 


Well I am. 



And you know what they say: once an addict....



Even after going without sugar for 47 days I went crazy style on some cupcakes.

 I'm pretty sure I've got candida! I did this simple candida yeast test I copied from a great resource,the hcg homeopathic weight loss method yahoo group in the files section.:

Here is a home Candida yeast test, one you can do in the morning. We do not know the source of this home Candida test but it's been around a long time and is thought to be quite reliable in the evaluation of Candida symptoms:
Up to 85% of Americans May Have Candida - DO YOU?
Try this Fast and FREE Candida Saliva Test!
When you awake in the morning, before you put anything into your mouth, work up some saliva and spit it into a clear glass of water. Within 1-30 minutes, look in the glass.


If there are strings coming down from your saliva, or if the water turned cloudy, or if your saliva sank to the bottom, YOU MAY HAVE A CANDIDA CONCERN!


Healthy saliva will simply float on the top!
(You may want to put out a glass of water in the bathroom or on the nightstand the night before you wish to do the home Candida Saliva test, just to remind yourself not to brush your teeth prior to spitting into the glass.)
Why does this work?
Candida overgrowth begins in the intestines. Over time, as the fungal yeast multiplies it begins to travel, moving up the digestive tract into the stomach (bloating, indigestion), up the esophagus and into the mouth. If it becomes strongly entrenched there you can see a white film on your tongue and inside your cheeks. Once it has moved up to the mouth and you spit into a glass of water the yeast will sink because it is heavier than water. If there is no yeast it will float on top.

I took this same candida yeast test last November before beginnng hCG and my spit was crazy sinking. This time it is way better, but clearly clouding the water and making it's swirly action down through the cup.

O.k. so now i've got to figure out: now what???

now, if you'll excuse me while i remove that cup from the counter before my children get thirsty!!! :)

when you play with fire:

this is my hcg journey.

here i sit and write another entry that i wish i didn't need to be writing.

i don't like to publicly admit that i'm human,

but i share this dreadful tale because then it becomes a learning experience.

also, someone, somewhere can learn from my mistakes.

and it's for me.

now don't think i've gone off the deep end or something like that.

i just made a SLIGHT (term used loosely) dietary error.

when i'm on hcg i'm strong. (except when i think i'm pregnant)

without the hCG love running through my veins i've proved to be downright naughty!

on tuesday i realized again, that i need to be a little more cautious.

let me explain.

it sounds harmless, really.

i was baking a cake.

my firstborn was turning 6 and i took it upon myself to make cupcakes for his little party.

i didn't think second thoughts about making the cake.

i just got out the ingredients and began adding them to the kitchen aid.

as i added butter, fresh ground flour, cocoa, sugar, eggs, vanilla, the batter began to take beautiful form.

and it smelled good too.

then, the thought went through my head,

"oh, one lick won't hurt"

i was my own peer pressure.

in no time, i had convinced myself that one lick wouldn't make any difference.

from that one tiny decision....

i ate a LARGE hand full of batter

i was so irrational that i didn't even use a spoon, i just scooped it right up with the cup of my hand.

after that, the battle in my brain continued.

"no more! " i'd demand.

"oh why not, you've already messed up this much, why not enjoy yourself" i'd retort.

unfortunately the bad guys won the battle and i ended up eating 3.5 additional baked cupcakes topped with the most delectable butter-cream frosting i've ever laid my lips on. oh. my.

they tasted amazing, but.................................

after i snapped out of my sugar induced coma, all i could think about was what the scale would say the next morning.

then, to my surprise,i was the exact same weight i was the day before. 

i was relieved, but as my day progressed,

i physically began to pay the consequence for my choice.

i turned into the same sugar monster i remembered from days gone by. 

believe me, she's not pretty.

by golly, she is down right witchy! 

the children cowered.

my body started aching.

i felt depressed.

i laid on the couch and wallowed and napped.

my brain turned to mush and i couldn't even think straight. 

i haven't been so exhausted in longer than i care to remember.

and then as i thought, i did remember. 

i remembered that oh so familiar feeling. 

lethargy,

mood swings,

aches,

stiff joints.

that's the way i felt quite often when i was the mammoth 274 lbs that i was.

it sucks to feel like junk.

the next day, improved a  bit, but still suffered from some of the same symptoms. 

yuck.

not only that, but the scale finally accounted for my error.

i went from 222.6 to 223.9.

and i was glad. 

it was just the right jab in my side to remind me of what junk food does to my body.

i'm all about creating/hoping for natural consequences for my children....and for me too when i behave poorly.

so, i did what any regretting phase 3er would do, i did a steak day.

all day, i drank and drank and drank and drank (water of course)

then, for dinner i ate those juicy ribeyes followed by an apple like have several times before. 

and then, i hoped for the best.

this morning when i woke and weighed, LUCKILY, i was back down to 221. 

not only that, 

 my energetic, mentally stable, mostly patient and sweet self had returned.

all i have left is the memory of how downright awful i felt.

thank goodness.

my goal:

to remember. 

my plan:

be smart: don't start.......

because one lick CAN hurt!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and in honor of my hatred towards sugar and it's unappreciated influence on my psyche.... i'm throwing the frozen cupcakes OUT!!! 

sugar is not my friend.

it is my healhy, happy bodies' enemy!

thankfully,my body had been without any type of refined sugar or wheat for over 47 days and i wasn't so numb that i could see the harmful effects of those glistening white granules.

  

p.s. while we're on a sugar note here, i just wanted to share this: i received an e-mail from mercola.com for this article while writing this post: 

Agave Nectar Health Food Hype

i found it very enlightening! 

enjoying:

stuff like this:

immensly!

i absolutlely adore phase 3 food!!!
now, if only i could convince myself to stay on phase 3 indefinately, i'd be set!
it's no surprise to me that sugar and starch are my nemesis! 

since steak days were my best friend during the 1st round, i've decided to do things a  bit differently so i could actually be STABLE! and so far, it's working.
after an arm wrestle with myself i decided to not eat dairy this phase.
no homemade buttermilk ranch,
no cheesy broccoli,
no mozzerella cauliflower pizza.
no.......
(and this list goes on and on)

i'm not going to lie, i miss it, a lot!

i've had only very small nibbles of it and...

so far, so good!
today's weight: 222.6.
yesterday's: 222.8
the day before's 222.8

repeat.

my body must be agreeing with my decision.
(unfortunately for my taste buds whom happen to LOVE cheese)

note to blog:

My Dear hhCG blog, 

It's been a long time, I know. Sorry I've been so distant, but once again the time has come to focus more time on other things. Like my 3 children and husband for example. :)  I love you and hCG, but man it's nice to be on an 8 week break from the intense part of the protocol. I will miss phase 2's simplicity, but am happy to have so many choices on my plate once again!  You've been wonderful for me, so don't think this is a goodbye. It's just a see you soon, but not too often. I'm sure I'll be back soon enough when those pesky little pounds come knocking on my door asking for a steak day. I'm sort of a fair weather blogger, but so be it. 

So far, phase 3 has been absolutely delightful. Words cannot describe how enjoyable my luscious salad was tonight. This picture isn't even all that attractive, but boy, was it delicious! All of the many, many vegetables, bits of bacon and avocado dressing had a party on my tongue. It was wonderful! I can't wait to see what fun I'll find on my tongue tomorrow! I think some cauliflower is calling my name.

Sincerely, 

Julie (the 222 lb. skinni(er) girl.)

p.s. I just had to share what lovely stuff I found in the Trader Joe's Treasure Chest (a.k.a. dumpster.) Their organic heirloom tomatoes were delightful, even if i had to pick out a few yucky ones. :)

Round 2 Phase 2 Day 40 {bags are packed...almost done w/ this leg of the journey}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

221.8

Total Loss: 52.8 lbs.

Today's Loss: .2 lbs.

Loss this round: 29.6 lbs. 

A piddly minus -.2????

I'll take it!!!!

Any loss is better than the NOTHING that happened 5 days in a row after the charts said 224 Last Tuesday!

Finally, On Sunday the scale said 223 then yesterday 222. 

Thank goodness!

I'm definitely feeling trunky here. 

Losses have been wonderful, but lately it's slow. 

Maybe it is the 100g. ground beef I ate 3x since Saturday! 

Otherwise I've been very good. 

Well, except for the poor sleep habits which I've yet to conquer! 

Oh yeah. Then there was that tiny sample of corned beef I sampled at Trader Joe's. 

Beef is allowed, right?

Wrong! (When sugar is one of the ingredients!)

Luckily, as I dream about cheese and homemade ranch dressing and avocados, 

I'm not hungry AT ALL!!!!
No real cravings even. 

I have to remind myself to eat. 

That's weird to me. 

It's 3:30 and all I've had is tomatoes and water. 

And I'm full! 

At this point I feel like I could stay on this for many weeks to come. 

Too bad!

Da rules is da rules. 

Some things I am looking forward to on p3: 

Butter, oil, butter, luscious salad, cauliflower, broccoli, watermelon, pears, nuts, and a nice rib eye once in a while! ;)

Feeling happy about: The fact that my regular size bath towel GOES ALL THE WAY AROUND MY REAR!  Been a long time since it could do that!!! Hooray!

Round 2 Phase 2 Day 35 {lady in waiting}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

224

Total Loss: 50.6 lbs.

Today's Loss: 0 lbs.

Loss this round: 26.8 lbs. 

 

NOTHING happening around here since the big 5-0. 

Starting to get a bit impatient.

Thought the scale would move for me today.

My time is ticking away here.

ONLY 9 DAYS OF LOOSING LEFT!!!

Oh well. There's always tomorrow. 

Hopefully!

my un-edited swimsuit edition...

This is me with a bit more skin showing.  I didn't have the gall to post these earlier because I've still got a ways to go before I feel confident about the way my legs look, but I still need to remember to be happy about how the REST of my body is looking. I resisted the urge to use the smudge tool to smooth out my dimply legs. Even without that I look and feel sooo much better. 

I was looking in the mirror and notice my back in a side mirror.I lost my hump back. My double chin is only a 1 1/4 chin instead. Since I'm standing in the same spot, I like how I can see how much LESS of the door my bottom is covering up....even if it's still rather large.   So today, I'm going to {try hard to}  celebrate what I have accomplished, not what still needs to be improved!

It is a good day.

Minus 50 lbs!

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

224.4

Total Loss: 50.2 lbs.

Today's Loss: 2 lbs.

Loss this round: 26.4 lbs.

Hooray! I'm part of the 50lbs lost club! And I don't think one even exists! 

No matter, I'm still so happy. I love to look in the mirror and see such a drastic change!

 

Reactions: TOM is hardly here at all. Going back on drops.  I've also swithed to PHP brand hcg sold by Homeopathic Weightloss Meathod. From what I hear they work the same. They also only cost $27/ 20oz. bottle.

Looking forward to: more of this loosing stuff! 

Out of bed: 7:40

Exercise: none

HCG: 8:00 15 drops

Breakfast: MY STORED FAT...

Snack:1:35  orange yumminess- {i shared it with my mom not on hCG and she even LOVED it.}

Lunch:  3:30 around 80g. cooked shrimp and 4 romas with the usual seasoning

HCG: 2:00 hCG 25 drops

Dinner:6:45 1 organic cucumber to to while driving.

HCG: 8:40  20 drops

Snack:9:30 small organic fuji and 150g. chicken.

Bedtime:12:30

Water: didn't measure today...less than a gallon:not good!

Cheating: extra chicken that i was cooking up way tooo late at night. i ran out of my pre cooked frozen pacs. and had to be gone till late tonight so i was overly hungry. 

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

226.4

Total Loss: 47.2 lbs.

Today's gain: .4 lbs.

Loss this round: 24 lbs.

Reations: UGG! NEED TO IMPROVE MY SLEEP HABITS!

Looking forward to: eating butter once again. i miss my good friend FAT. :)

Out of bed: 6:20

Exercise:40 min. slow walk

HCG: 8:00 15 drops

Breakfast: MY STORED FAT...

Lunch: 12:00 cucumber/fish/grapefruit

HCG: 2:0030 drops

HCG:5:00 15 drops

Dinner:6:45 

100g. organic chicken and 1 large tomato , chopped, pan cooked

Snack:10 p.m. small organic pink lady apple

Bedtime:11:15

Water:Gallon

Other: chocolate smooth move....I'm REALLY starting to enjoy the stuff! didn't think i'd ever say that. 

Cheating:none.

Round 2 phase 2 Day 31 {fast sunday}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

226

Today was Fast Sunday.  I didn't follow the protocol very well. I was part of a fast from food and drink for 24 hours.During that time I was fasting with many of my faith like we do the 1st Sunday of of each month I didn't eat or drink anything until 5:00. I chose not to fast last month because of hCG but convinced myself that making the sacrifice of unlost pounds would be of greater benefit. It was easy to not partake of food, thanks to hCG, but I was so thirsty! I ended up eating all 500 calories and only 1/2 gals of water. Last round I had a gain the next day, but for some reason, I still didn't get the whole gallon in. I knew fasting would mess me up, but decided it was worth the cost.  I crammed all the food in and boy was I full!

 

Out of bed:9:30

Exercise:none 

HCG: 8:00 15 drops

Breakfast: MY STORED FAT...

HCG: 11:00 15 drops

Snack:1:35 

HCG: 2:00 15 drops

Lunch: 

HCG:5:00

Dinner:6:00 100g. buffalo and 1 1 onion cooked in the same pan. salt/cajun season 6:30  grapefruit

Snack:8:00 100 g. of Perch w/ skin on {that was WAY too good for my good.}I think the skin was too fatty and therefore was scrumptious. I saved the extra grams for my husband to eat but I ended up scarfing it down before he had a chance.... oh, and tomatoes.

9:30 small pink lady organic apple.

Bedtime:10:30

Water:Gallon

Other: chocolate Smooth moove.

Cheating:the extra fish. but NOT the cream cheese spice cake we made for my mum's birthday party at my house....OR the delicious chili and potatoes OR the homemade ranch and chef salad. I just smelled those things a bit too long. :)

Round 2 Phase 2 Day 30 {still loosing}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

226.4

Total Loss: 48.2 lbs.

Today's Loss: 1 lbs.

Loss this round: 25 lbs.

Reactions: TOM is hardly here at all. Going back on drops. i am being dang strong. i haven't been craving anything lately and hardly even think about food as of late. hence the not eating till way late in the day. i remember having this same problem at the end of last phase 2. 

Looking forward to: new clothes. mine are getting too big...but i don't want to buy much till i'm done! 

Out of bed: 7:40

Exercise: shopping for several hrs. 

HCG: 8:00 15 drops

Breakfast: MY STORED FAT...

Snack:1:35  grapefruit

HCG: 2:00 30 drops

Lunch:  4:30 100g. cajun sole.

HCG:5:00 15

Dinner:5:45 100g.chicken and 4 roma tomatos

Snack:7:30 1 organic cucumber sliced thin-yum!

Bedtime:10:30

Water:Gallon

For the forgetful: 
This IS THE ONLY WAY to remember to get all my water in. To measure it all out ahead of time so don't have to keep track.

Other: chocolate smooth move.

Cheating:none.even at a bridal shower.

trying to correct misinformation. ;)

I watched this: 

HCG: Weight Loss miracle or recipe for disaster? [On local news] 

and then the follow up article.
State medical exmainers lift ban on HCG for weight loss!

Then wrote this comment:  
March 6, 2010 12:23am PST

I'm a huge advocate of hCG .I'm on homeopathic hCG right now. It WORKS! I have hope to loose weight for the first time. Already down 50 lbs and can't wait for 50 more! "Pounds and Inches" by Dr Simmeons and hCG have been an absolute miracle. If you research, you'll learn that it is amazing + you feel great. Whatever you do, don't take a news reporters word for it. The diet was NOT explained properly here, especially from a Weight Watchers lady. THAT program is a starvation diet. Of course she is against it. It is putting her company out of business! I did Weight Watchers and lost 6 pounds in 5 weeks. On my first round of hCG... 30 lbs in 6 weeks. You do the math! When on hCG you only consume 500 calories, but are actually using the stored calories from your body to THRIVE since hCG sends a constant supply of stored fat into your blood. If you want me to share more, e-mail me morjulie at gmail dot com. I don't sell the stuff, just want to share w/ anyone who needs it. Cheers. Julie

p.s. Oh, and to all of you anti's who are putting it down, do some research before you act like you know what's going on. Read "Pounds and Inches." Great place to start if you are mislead.

And therefore got to bed WAY TOO LATE!!!  ugg. 

I think I am becoming very passionate about this stuff.

Can you tell?

I would just LOVE to see a study comparing and contrasting weight lost and loss maintained between hCG and Weight Watchers...even though I already KNOW what the results would say.

I would LOVE to hear your opinion on this article. 

POST ADDITION.

I was reading comments over at the artcicle and saw this guy, Bradley's comment:

BRADLEY L.

March 6, 2010 6:28am PST

I am currently injecting the HCG that is in question. my doctor explained the effects and symptoms of this weight loss medicine. the first week was rough but my body has adjusted to it well. i am losing weight about a pound a day with only a 500 calorie a day diet. that is the hard part, not eating. i was never told this HCG was banned, if i had been better advised i may not have done it.

 then wrote a response:
JULIE

March 8, 2010 8:06am PST

Mark as Offensive

Bradley, I heard that the State of Nevada wasn't "approving" RX hCG when I started last November so I felt very secure in using the homeopathic hCG. Plus on homeopathic hCG, you don't have to inject. Now that I've learned, I would do the RX, even if it was "banned." 

Have you read Pounds and Inches by Dr. Simeons?
It explains this all very well.

HCG is so effective it will put the whole diet industry in shambles. In my opinion, that is why the FDA will not approve it. There is WAY too much money involved in the diet industry, which can't be made w/ hCG because it is a hormone and can not be patented. I would not stop this just because the Government is not for it. Research it. HCG is a good thing. I always remind myself to think critically when the news tries to scare us into thinking a certain way.... Good luck on your journey.

Julie

Round 2 Phase 2 Day 29 {lost boy}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

227.4

Total Loss: 47.2 lbs.

Today's Loss: 1.6 lbs.

Loss this round: 24 lbs.

Reactions:
I forgot to not use hCG on my tom heavy day. Oops.

I lost a boy! That's right. Today is the day that marks the loss of as much weight as my 47 pound 6 year old boy. I lifted him today. He's heavy! I'm just so glad that I don't have to carry that much more around any longer!!! Did I ever mention that I love hCG???

Looking forward to: Buying new clothes. Almost all of my pants are falling off. Even the ones in my skinny pile fit too baggy to look good. Just wish I could get some "loaner" clothes in this size, cause I sure won't be using them for long!!!! Was a 24 now I can fit into a snug 20. :)

Out of bed: 7:40

Exercise:just turning many of the pages of a great book: "The Help." :)

HCG: 8:00 none-tom

Breakfast: MY STORED FAT...

HCG: 11:00 none-tom

Snack:1:35  orange yumminess

HCG: 2:00 none-tom

Lunch:  3:30 110g. Perch {which was a nice change} and 2c. cooked spinach. w/ Aminos and cajun seasoning

HCG:5:00 none-tom

Dinner:6:45 100g. organic chicken and 1 large tomato , chopped, pan cooked with Cumin, Tumeric, TJ's everyday seasoning and Chili powder.

Snack:7:30 organic fuji

Bedtime:1 a.m.

Water:Gallon

Other: no smooth move - need to buy more.

Cheating:none. even though i as at a party i was a perfect good girl. that's quite a feat for me since get togethers are my weakness! If ONLY I could convince myself to do than when I'm not on hCG I'd be WAY better off. At home I'm very health conscious and eat only whole, real food, but out and about I usually have no clue what is in their food. Well, sometimes I do know, but choose to ignore it. I need to change my old {bogus} philosophy that I can eat whatever I want when eating out or at a party before I get to phase 4 so I don't repeat what I did last time!!!

Round 2 Phase 2 Day 28 {welcome, tom}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

229

Total Loss: 45.6 lbs.

Today's Gain: 1 lbs.

{TOM did it, cause i was being very good..}

Loss this round: 22.4 lbs.

Dear T.O.M.,

    

I'm pleased that you have arrived last night even earlier than I expected!. Never thought I'd say that cause I usually don't feel happy to have you come around, but today, I'm glad. You have put all of my wondering to an end. And because of that, I'll even forgive you that Pound you brought with you. Just this once though.

               
Sincerely,        Julie                                              

In other news:

I was thinking about how things were going on 60 drops a day. I've come to the conclusion that..... 

I HAVE NO CLUE! 

I do know one thing though. It's not  hurting me. ;) 

Looking forward to: 50lbs lost. Hopefully w/ in a week.

Out of bed: 7:40

Exercise:just turning many of the pages of a great book: "The Help." :)

HCG: 8:00 15 drops

Breakfast: MY STORED FAT...

HCG: 11:00 15 drops

Snack:1:35  grapefruit

HCG: 2:00 15 drops

Lunch:  3:30 100g. Sole and 4 small Roma Tomatos.

HCG:5:00

Dinner:6:45 100g. organic chicken and 1 organic cucumber. salt/cajun season 

Snack:1 organic fuji

Bedtime:10:30

Water:Gallon

Other: Smooth moove.

Cheating:zippo, zero, zilcho, nada, none, n/a

                                                                     ,

Round 2 Phase 2 Day 11 {a complicated equation}

Starting weight Nov. 6, 2009:

274.6

Starting Weight this round:

(after loading)

251.4

Today's weight

228

Total Loss: 46.6 lbs.

Today's Loss: 2.6 lbs.

Loss this round: 23.4 lbs.

I'm back. 

But I wish I could erase some of my actions.

Frankly, I don't even want to write about the past couple of days at all, but that would kind of defeat the purpose of this journal to begin with. Wouldn't it. 

It all started over 2 weeks ago.

Here is the equation:

Ovulation

+

A broken contraceptive

+

Leakage from a place that only leaks when I am lactating .

+

Unusual Hunger

=

Convincing my self that I probably was.

BUT....

Thankfully, for the sake of weightloss, I am not.

And I am relived. 

We have more kids in the plan, but not yet. 

I have NOT enjoyed the wondering game that made my commitment to this hCG thing wishy washy. 

And I didn't even want to write until I knew what was going on...or in this case, what wasn't going on in my body. 

I thought I'd need to go off of the homeopathic hCG I use to take the test, but learned from my hCG buddy, Michelle, that the drops won't indicate you are with child on a test. It was also nice to have  her remind me that the baby would in no way would be harmed while I was on hCG or VLCD.

Since I found out I'm good to go, I've been a good little girl once again...which is WAY more effective when it comes to this protocol! 

I'm hoping to go back and write the days I missed, but don't hold your breath. 

I'll just say one thing. 

I've been reminded that following this thing to the letter is SO much more effective than what I was doing. 

Phew.

I'm so happy that can tune back in to the previously scheduled program! 

 

Only loosing 2.6 since Friday wasn't good, but hey, it could have been way worse! 

Looking forward to:

Only 3.4 lbs and I hit the 50 lbs. lost mark!!!! 

Out of bed: 7:40

Exercise: 1 hour early morn walk and some nice conversation

HCG: 8:00 15 drops
Breakfast: MY STORED FAT... 1 lemon in warm water.

HCG: 11:00 15 drops

Snack:1:35  1 orange, 1c. ice, 1/2 c. water, a few drops of vanilla. The vanilla makes it extra yummy.

HCG: 2:00 15 drops

Lunch:  1:30 100g. buffalo, a bed of beautiful lettuce from my little garden and acv garlic dressing. it looked beautiful on the platter i got for only a buck at a garage sale last week...and it was yummy too. 

HCG:5:00

Dinner:6:45 100g. Sole seasoned w/ creole and Franks cayenne hot sauce and a bunch of Asparagus.

Snack: 8:00 grapefruit

Bedtime:11:00

Water:Gallon!

Other: Smooth Move.

Cheating: NONE! Glad to be on the right track once again.